Personal Development;Life Enhancement;Achievement
Posts tagged NLP
A Bit About Goal Setting
Sep 1st
“If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.” ~Henry David Thoreau, Walden, 1854
As I write this, I am sitting in a coffee shop on the South side of Minneapolis, Minnesota. I have just finished walking for an hour around Lake Calhoun, one of the beautiful string of lakes and parks that help to make this city such a delight. Even though I am traveling on business here today, I made time for this walk – regular walking is a critical component to my achieving the goal that I shared last time. (The weather here is so nice today, it really was not a challenge at all to get myself out walking – today the challenge was to quit at an hour!)
I am going to be sharing just a bit more about my health goal for next year. I’m doing this for a couple of reasons. First, I want to clearly state to the world, and of course myself, exactly what I am going to do. (The how I am going to do this comes later – I certainly don’t know all of the how yet, but I have faith that I will find it.) Second, some of the ways that I have formed this goal, and am now committing to it, may be of use to some of my readers.
To recap, last time I shared that I had committed to the goal of getting myself back in shape in the coming twelve months. I made this goal public on this blog to get leverage on myself. Getting leverage on yourself can be a very good thing indeed. So can making a public commitment to getting something accomplished. I realized today that I had not been very specific in the details that I shared about that goal. Here are those missing specifics:
- By July 1st, 2011, I will weigh no more than 195 lbs (dressed in summer workout gear including shoes). This is very specific.
- My bodyfat percentage will be no more than 15% and I will have this professionally measured by a personal trainer at my health club.
- I will also be very aerobically fit. I will measure that this way: I will be jogging at least 3 times per week for at least 30 minutes each time at a pace no slower than 10 minutes per mile. Additionally, I will be bike riding at least 3 times per week for at least 1 hour each time at a pace no slower than 10 miles per hour.
Now that is a decently written goal for me and here are some of the reasons why:
- It is doable in the time frame (barely!).
- It is very measurable.
- It does take into account some larger aspects of my life. (I must be aerobically fit and has a healthy ending bodyfat percentage – it isn’t just about my ending weight.)
- Accomplishing this goal will open up lots of other aspects of my life as well.
Okay. Enough for today about my getting in great shape goal. Here is a question for you: Should you always share your goals publicly? I say no. Next time I’ll talk more about the why and why not of this.
Till next time faithful reader…Jack
“It is never too late to be who you might have been.” ~George Eliot
Avoid These Mistakes When Starting Your Book
Aug 25th
“A peacefulness follows any decision, even the wrong one.” ~Rita Mae Brown
In 2005 I decided that I was going to write a book. As I mentioned in my last entry, this wasn’t a consciously made choice. My unconscious mind decided that it was time to take action and let me know this at the end of a seminar.
I am not sure why I made that decision at that particular time. I had known that I would benefit from a book for years; as a seasoned and in-demand seminar leader, I almost always had the opportunity to sell products at the end of my presentations. Instead I used this time for chatting with attendees and over time, many of these chats ended up becoming coaching or consulting clients. (Although I can successfully coach virtually anyone that speaks a common language with me, I only consult on a handful topics.)
So, these seminars, along with other marketing techniques, kept me with a consistently full coaching practice, commonly with a waiting list, and I was complacent. Not lazy, just complacent.
Use me as a BAD example
Once I had made the decision to become a published non-fiction author, I thought about it virtually every day. And there is the beginning of the first mistake. I thought about it everyday. I invested energy into it every day. I felt bad that I wasn’t writing more – almost every day. What I didn’t do was take action on it every day – that would have taken a different and much wiser decision!
Three Mistakes I Made
Looking back 6 years, I am embarrassed. I should have known better! As an NLP practitioner, I had helped hundreds of people get unstuck and begin taking consistent action from a place of pleasure. From my slightly more enlightened future, I can look back now and see three big mistakes that I made.
- My first mistake was not deciding – not committing to – taking action every single day.
- My second mistake: I was using a pitiful motivation strategy to get myself to take what little action I did take! (I’ve talked about good and bad motivation strategies before and I will again – really useful stuff!)
- Finally I was not accountable to anyone for getting this book done. The only person I was reporting to about it was me and that was just not good enough.
Next time I’ll talk about what I would do differently and what I am doing differently now to write books.
Till next time faithful reader…Jack
“Choices are the hinges of destiny.” ~Attributed to both Edwin Markham and Pythagoras
Learn to Write Like Author Richard Bach
Mar 9th
“The meaning I picked, the one that changed my life: Overcome fear, behold wonder.” ~Richard Bach
Last time I wrote about planning and the importance of setting big goals, long term goals that stretch out at least 10 years. I was going to write today about the process of setting these goals and how to create a great attitude that makes this process even easier and even more fun. Well, scratch that bit of learning for a couple of days, wonderful as it would be and will be again and instead let’s go on a little adventure filled side-trip together. Let’s take a trip into the mind of best-selling author and pilot Richard Bach.
Learn to Write Like Richard Bach
I have been reading Richard’s books since early 1970 and after nearly 40 years, his books are still some of my best friends. Just like my human best friends, I enjoy seeing Richard’s books each time and I enjoy spending time with them. Also just like my human friends, Richard Bach’s books are smart and I learn something from them every time we meet. I had the pleasure of finding a short video interview with Richard Bach a couple of days ago and it really had an impact on me. I am including a link to this video here and I encourage you to watch it. For ears that are ready to hear, there are wonderful, bright and beautiful gems of empowering beliefs just waiting to be picked up in this interview. Next time I will talk about some of these beliefs that Richard is gifting us with and how we can use them to make our own writing better and more fun for us and for our readers. The link will autoload and start to play immediately. Link to Richard Bach video interview.
Till next time faithful reader…Jack
“When you have come to the edge of all the light you have
And step into the darkness of the unknown
Believe that one of the two will happen to you
Either you’ll find something solid to stand on
Or you’ll be taught how to fly!” ~Richard Bach
Charles Dickens and Groundhog Day
Feb 2nd
“Groundhog Day is a lot like a rock concert but the people are better behaved and there’s a groundhog involved…” ~Tom Chapin, editor of the Punxsutawney Spirit newspaper.
… As an aside, it is Groundhog Day in the United States while I am writing this entry. Although I am not sure that “Punxsutawney Phil” is any better at weather forecasting than me, and I am not very good; I do love the concept! The cute little devil did see his shadow today and has forecast 6 more weeks of winter. Not a shocker – this winter does not seem to want to let go. …
Last time I talked about my first book and its upcoming release in November of 2010. I also mentioned that my decision to self-publish this first book was influenced by my research into the life of Charles Dickens. Here is a bit more about that story:
I recently read “The Making of Charles Dickens” by Christopher Hibbert and I really enjoyed the experience! I not only discovered a new author whose style I liked, but a prolific author as well. This means I have lots of great books waiting for me to find and read. I also got some great insights into what might have helped Charles Dickens be the incredible novelist that he was. (Did you know that he is one of the very few authors that has never gone out of print? And this, as I write this entry, some 140 years after his death? Wow!)
I am always looking for the “secrets of success” or the unique beliefs that help exceptional people be exceptional. Here are some of the secrets that I extracted from my recent study of “Boz”:
1) Being extremely focused on the task at hand – fiercely determined to get it right – is a key to success in writing (and any other aspect of living.)
2) It is okay to be afraid about the reception your writing will receive – as long as you are brave enough to get it out to the public to read.
3) Believe in the value of your writing, even if others at first do not share your enthusiasm.
4) Write about what you know intimately well and share the clarity of your vision.
5) Don’t be afraid to ask what you think your writing is worth.
6) You can do more than you think you can.
7) It is fine to use newest technology to publish your books. (Dickens commonly used magazines and serial releases of chapters – then he sold the books as completed documents. This was pretty cutting edge stuff for the day.) This final point is the one that swayed me to the side of self-publishing.
Next time I’ll be talking about the complete set of reasons why I decided to self-publish this first book and what the implications might be for you and me.
Till next time faithful reader…Jack
“I never could have done what I have done without the habits of punctuality, order, and diligence, without the determination to concentrate myself on one subject at a time”. ~Charles Dickens from his novel “David Copperfield”
A New Year and New Beginnings
Jan 1st
“We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives… not looking for flaws, but for potential.” ~Ellen Goodman
Happy New Year! May this be a wonderful year for all of us! It is approximately 7 am on New Year’s Day as I am writing this entry. I actually tried to start writing this 2 hours ago, but with the recent death of my computer and the loss of all my saved passwords and shortcuts, the process of getting into my blog and website was considerably more challenging than in the past. I have been actively researching new computers and will make my selection soon – and then things will return to even better than normal – or so I hope.
For now, I wish you all the best. My intention is provide useful information in an interesting way that you can immediately use to enhance your life – come back often and let me know how I am doing.
Bye for now…Jack
“We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year’s Day.” ~Edith Lovejoy Pierce
Illness, Recovery and Change
Nov 2nd
“You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you’ll discover will be wonderful. What you’ll discover is yourself.” ~Alan Alda
I have been ill again – terribly ill and only able to function at the most trivial levels for nearly three weeks. This illness, this being unwell, has been a recurring event in my life, really for a significant portion of the last seven years. In many ways, it feels like being ill, or operating at well under my former energy levels, has been the defining state of the previous stage of my life. I say previous because I know that I am beginning the next stage of my life and this new stage, this stage that is being born now, is about very different things.
I am not completely sure what the stage of my life that is now ending was all about, but I do know some. I did lots of things. I learned lots of things. I had successes and I had lots of things that turned out very differently than I hoped. I know that during these years I learned what my calling is for the next stage of my life: I am, and am meant to be, a writer, a business and executive coach and a seminar leader. This wasn’t clear at the beginning of this stage – seven years ago I was returning to the working world after a nearly ten year retirement and I was very unclear about the next focus of my life’s work.
I had always been a big risk-taker. Following my intuition, leaping and then having faith that I could find a way to make it work – this had been my pattern and a driving force behind why I was able to be retired at such an early age. I had found the ways to make it work and my intuition is usually right. (It is sometimes hard to tell my intuition from fear or from unrealized dreams of my parents, but if I get quiet and honest, I can tell.) I had always been a very quick learner and I came into this world with a great toolbox of skills – although I have always achieved a great deal compared to many others – compared to my abilities – I have been in the past one of the great underachievers of the past fifty years.
I’m not going to go over at this time the details of how I learned my calling; that might be fun to talk about some other time though. I am going to talk just a bit more about being ill. Why was I ill so much?
- I didn’t make being vibrantly healthy a priority and
- being sick stopped me from taking too many risks and starting too many projects.
I think it is as simple as that. When I honestly look at the past seven years and ask myself:
- What could I have done differently that would have drastically increased my health?
- Did I gain anything by being sick or unwell so much of the time?
Then I get the answers from above. I didn’t make health a priority and I needed to learn focus and a bit of conservatism in my choices. So have I learned? Perhaps not quite, but I am close. If my calling, what I am supposed to be doing right now is to be a writer, a business and executive coach and a seminar leader and I leave it there, then I have not learned. My body is aging and needs to become a priority – every single day.
Now I will think of myself as:
- A Peak Performance Athlete
- A Writer
- A Business and Executive Coach
- A Seminar Leader
Will this change be en0ugh? As long as action follows intention then yes it will. Come along for the ride and let’s find out together. It’s not always easy being born – I may yell sometimes and make some messes; still my new life is out there and I want to live it!
For those of you waiting for me to finish talking about some great topics that I started and never finished, thank you for your patience! The rest is coming.
Till next time…Jack
“Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it.” ~Buddha
A Fresh Start Part Two
Sep 23rd
“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.“ ~e.e. cummings
I’m getting excited about moving and leaving old outdated habits behind. How about you? Would you like a fresh start? Today I am just going to cover some of the elements of a successful ritual for leaving the past behind and starting anew. There are myriad ways to do this, but I have found the procedure that I going to spell out in the next few entries to be effective and reasonably simple.
For today, here are the questions I would like you to ponder and answer for yourself:
- What old habits would you like to leave behind? (What habits do you have currently that no longer serve you?)
- What positive things do you think those habits did for you in the past and might still be doing at some level?
- Are you truly okay with leaving these old habits behind? Ask yourself, be honest and if not – ask yourself why?
- What new habits would you like to put in their place? (If you could have the perfect habits that would really make success, on your terms, certain – what would those habits be?)
- Remember a time when you made a change for the better, anytime in your life, and write down as much of the details of this time and this change as you can remember.
- If you haven’t already, write a brief description of your vision for your future life – a compelling vision of what your future life will be like once you have accomplished your next series of life goals – make this vision perhaps twelve to eighteen month out.
That’s it for today. Tomorrow you can read about my personal answers to these questions and I’ll continue to lay out the process for doing this wonderful empowering exercise.
Till next time faithful reader…Jack
“I think of life itself now as a wonderful play that I’ve written for myself, and so my purpose is to have the utmost fun playing my part.” ~Shirley MacLaine
A Fresh Start in Life
Sep 21st
“No matter where you go, there you are” ~Buckaroo Banzai (and many others! Follow this link to learn more about this great quote)
We have been moving into a new home, new to us anyway, for the past week or so. There are still lots of smaller things to take from the old house and lots to organize. My home office for example is going to be really great and I am putting significant energy into its design and layout. I want a space that really supports me – when I am not traveling I spend much of my working time in my home office – and I want to feel great and empowered as soon as I walk in the door. To support this goal, I am buying new shelves for my books, my great and lifelong friends, and I will finally have room for a large work table near these racks of books. This part of my office will look and feel much like a library and I love libraries!
The Common Problem with Starting Over
I have moved many times in my life and most times the moves had one common issue – I always brought me – with my various problems and less than optimal habits right along with me! I thought this time I would do something very different. I am going to use this move as an opportunity of leaving some old habits behind and beginning some new more empowering habits. How am I go to do this? I am going to use ritual and visualization and evoking memories of past times of change. I think I will invest the next few blog entries covering how I do this and how you might do the same – whether or not you are moving at all!
Come back next time and see more about how to create and effectively use your own “Ritual of Starting Over”.
Till next time faithful reader…Jack
“If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.” ~Milton Berle
Testing New WordPress Themes
Sep 14th
“Change is the law of life and those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.” ~John F. Kennedy
My website got hacked again over the weekend – not once but twice – and you know what? I’m grateful. At first I was upset and angry at the hacker that had targeted me. Now I am actually grateful to the little online cockroach that attacked me – I was forced to learn and change – it has already been great!
What I Learned from Being Hacked
- I was forced to learn more about website security – this will certainly be critical in the future.
- I was forced to update my WordPress code – a great thing to update.
- I was forced to review and then select a new online security and anti-virus program – this was something I had always meant to do.
- I was forced to review and then select from a number of newer and more robust WordPress Themes – this is what I am doing now and I love all of the new options.
So, being hacked was actually a great learning experience for me, and all this learning happened in just the last few days. So thank you little online cockroach! In your desire to hurt me and feel in some pitiful way significant, you actually helped!
Testing WordPress Themes
I am taking this opportunity to completely revamp my website. I am going to make it more comprehensive, more viewer friendly, of course more secure, and I intend – more visually interesting. Come back often and see the changes.
Till next time faithful reader…Jack
“Whosoever desires constant success must change his conduct with the times.” ~Niccolo Machiavelli
Making Money Online and Writing Part 9
Aug 27th
“If you want to make your dreams come true, the first thing you have to do is wake up.” ~J.M. Power
A couple of entries ago, I was talking about the things that I have been consistently procrastinating. Here is a recap of that list of shame (well, really mild embarrassment):
- I am not consistently writing at least 1000 words per day on my book.
- I am not consistently doing the needed research weekly to have the 1000 words to write.
- I am not consistently getting up every morning at 5am to write.
- I am not consistently lifting weights 4 times per week.
- I am not consistently marketing myself to new speaking venues weekly.
- I am not consistently reading the blogs of writers that I respect.
- I am not consistently commenting on the blogs of writers that I respect.
This week I have done much better. Really, as soon as I wrote up the list and looked it over, I knew I could do better. Why did I do better? Here is the process that I went over to put myself into a different place – to come from a different perspective:
- I looked at my dreams for my life – business and personal – for the next few years and re-associated to how great it would feel when I had achieved these things. It will feel incredible!
- I looked at the things I was procrastinating and verified that there were critical – they were – they are.
- I honestly asked myself, expecting an answer and willing to listen, “Why am I procrastinating on these critical items?”
- I wrote down the answers for each of these “procrastination issues”.
- I committed to taking action daily both on the critical steps and the answers. (By the way, the most common reason for me not taking action was comparing my early work in progress to the great completed works of others – I felt badly and then did not take action.)
Now, everything isn’t just as I want it yet. I will need to fine tune some attitudes and beliefs and habits to make it so. Still, I am now taking action on all of these and that feels great. A similar process can work for almost anyone that is putting off what needs to be done.
Till next time faithful reader…Jack
“Great ideas need landing gear as well as wings.” ~C.D. Jackson